I meet a lot of people who have North Node in Libra and South Node in Aries who are in their early twenties and I also meet a lot of people with this same nodal axis who are in their forties. I’m also writing this in 2021 and I’ve noticed that the quarantine has hit folks with North Node in Libra especially hard. It’s been hard on all of us, for sure, but it’s especially been difficult for people with South Node in Aries and this inherited sense of loneliness to navigate the alienation of quarantine.
Why? Not because North Node in Libra South Node in Aries people have a harder time being alone—in fact, they find it all too easy. They find it too easy. Loneliness is normalized until it’s the only kind of reality one can expect from the world.
Libra North Node Aries South Node people expect to be misfits. They expect alienation because they’ve learned how to depend on themselves as a survival skill.
There’s also a huge difference between how North Node in Libra South Node in Aries looks in different age groups. People in their twenties with North Node in Libra tend to have Chiron in Libra and Pluto in Sagittarius. People in their forties with North Node in Libra tend to have Chiron in Aries and Pluto in Libra.
During this pandemic, a lot of folks with North Node in Libra in their forties have felt their social anxiety intensify. They’re worried that people won’t accept them the same way, that they’re somehow failed their friends, and that people won’t be able to see or recognize the changes they have found within themselves. North Node in Libra people who are in their forties often feel that they are not doing relationships right, because their Pluto is in Libra, and they fear that no relationship can satisfy their yearnings. They are afraid that there is something about themselves, when they have Chiron in Aries, that will somehow sabotage any relationship.
The people who turned 24 and 25 during quarantine with North Node in Libra have some of the same feelings but older people tend to be a little more isolated than younger people, generally speaking. A lot of people with North Node in Libra are navigating the world as an adult for the first time and they’re trying to feel themselves out while everything has been in lockdown. They’re trying to build adult friendships with the same hurdles that adult friendships always bring (awkwardness, fear of vulnerability, lack of time) but with a stay at home order.
A lot of twenty something year olds with North Node in Libra South Node in Aries have Chiron copresent with North Node. A lot of these people felt like they were too different from their peers and that they could never fit in.
If North Node in Libra South Node in Aries people have this inherited sense of loneliness, then they have also inherited the hope of connection. The reason why Libra North Node Aries South Node people are scared of connection, the reason why they are often angry when they do not feel connected, is because they yearn for their hope of connection to exist as a protected thing. And they’re having to learn that hope, far from fragile, thrives not when it is protected but often when it is challenged.
Assumptions about Libra North Node Aries South Node
Again, in a way that is similar to Aries North Node Libra South Node delineations, a lot of the popular assumptions around Libra North Node and Aries South Node is rooted in hegemonic gender ideology. Aries is a boy and boys must be boys. Libra is a girl and girls are repressed and dainty. I’ve heard Libra North Node Aries South Node being described as a “bull in a china shop.” It’s often thought that Aries South Node is too uncouth, too boisterous, and too selfish to know how to get along with people.
But not everyone with Libra North Node Aries South Node are socialized to be men. Not everyone is allowed to be rude. Not everyone is allowed to be self centered or to even know the self.
It’s true that having nodes ruled by Venus and Mars means that, sometimes, security issues show up through feelings about gender but gender isn’t a diagnosis that you wear on your shoulders forever.
What Libra North Node Aries South Node people are concerned about is questions around whether they are worthy of connection. They wonder why anyone wants to be their friend and whether other people are capable of understanding them. They take pride in feeling like no one ever gets them but feel intense shame about this too. They’re afraid that they are capable of betraying themselves.
While questions around connection and worthiness can show up through gender dynamics, they can also show up in job anxiety, friendships, and everything else. Libra North Node Aries South Node can be about gender but only because gender influences so much of your experience of the world.
Security Issues: Aries South Node
Aries South Node people, in any given scenario, expect to lose. They feel like they have to, at all times, be prepared to lose their relationships, their jobs, and their joy. They believe that, in order to protect themselves from loss, that they are better off just never having the thing in the first place—that they are capable of protecting themselves from heartbreak by never falling in love, that they can protect themselves from getting fired by never applying for a job they want, and that they can protect themselves from a loss of joy by never experiencing joy in the first place.
This is why Aries South Node people try to live as islands. This is why they appear to have a lone wolf mentality. If they don’t appear to care whether other people are in their lives or not or what someone else might think of them, then they can never be lonely. Aries South Node people try to fortify their lives so that they never need to rely on another person for anything else, at least not things that are important.
But Aries South Node are often lonely! And not only are they lonely, but they are often taught to expect loneliness as a normal thing that will never go away. Because of this, they see their loneliness as a giant and empty pit that can never be filled. They’re afraid of loneliness and distrust what loneliness tells them.
Loneliness is a wise emotion. It knows how to deal with itself. It informs you what you want and gives you clarity over what might satisfy you. Your loneliness is not bottomless. Instead, it is very possible for your loneliness to find satisfaction. It is possible for you to find connection not despite loneliness but because you are lonely since loneliness is what gives you a yearning for love.
Fears: Libra North Node
Being accepted, for Libra North Node people, is terrifying. Being accepted is terrifying because it is something that is not within their control. They have no control over whether a group or a person is capable of accepting them or not. This lack of control over exclusion or inclusion is terrifying because it feels like a loss of power.
Despite their lone wolf stuff, which sometimes looks very cool or self assured from the outside, Libra North Node people are terrified of rejection. They often experience rejection as a description of who they are rather than an event. This leads them to internalize the decisions that other people make—for them to think that another person’s actions can say something about them.
Libra North Node people often grow up having to anticipate exclusion. They often grow up feeling that they are too marginal, that they will never find anyone who really gets what they have going on inside.
This is why acceptance can feel terrifying—because being accepted means responsibility. Often, Libra North Node people conflate acceptance with power. Realizing that you have power is scary because it means that you recognize that you not only have the ability to harm but that you have also harmed.
Marginalization is a real experience. Libra North Node people are learning that the margins are not a territory that is in need of protection but simply a way of relating to power. They’re learning how to incorporate their own power into their identities and, in doing so, they’re learning that borders change and that margins shift.
Healing and Growth
What is often forgotten about Libra North Node Aries South Node people is how romantic they are. They’re ready to take a solo road trip any day, they’re dreaming in utopias, and they will do anything for their friends. They’re drifters who mill in and out of gas stations alone, getting up with the run before anyone else.
A lot of the romanticism of Libra North Node Aries South Node people is masochistic. A lot of it has to do with romanticizing loneliness, marginalization, and alienation. A lot of it has to do with representing toughness and pain all at once, of performing emotional alienation rather than enacting emotional vulnerability.
But Libra North Node Aries South Node people heal, also, through their romance. They’re romantically and platonically in love with their friends. And this romance isn’t eternally durable but something that needs protection.
Libra North Node Aries South Node people are afraid that they will not be protected in the ways that they need—that they won’t protect themselves in the ways that they need. They’re afraid that social pressure will make them betray themselves somehow. They’re afraid that their need for connection is bottomless and that it is something that will make them lose themselves. While Libra North Node Aries South Node people might initially think that they have a hard time trusting other people, what they really need is to trust themselves.
Healing and growth for Libra North Node Aries South Node people is about realizing that loneliness is not a pit, that it’s not something bottomless that will never be satiated but something that shows them crutial things about themselves. Healing and growth is about showing themselves that they can capable of honoring their integrity while meeting the needs that loneliness reveals.
Libra North Node Aries South Node people heal when they admit that they are sometimes lonely, that lonelness is a feeling and not a normal, and that loneliness as a feeling is helping them integrate their needs into their identities. They heal when they learn that loneliness is not a dangerous emotion and that it is not always necessary to greet danger by making the self more disposable. They heal when they treat themselves as more worthy of protection and more precious than they initially feel ready for.
