Our struggles are not symbolic. They are material.
Recently, I saw someone write something on Twitter that really hit me hard:
i really don’t like how so much social media activism is focused on “do this or you’re a bad person” instead of “do this because it’s going to help people”
— aniek (@pookiednp) January 23, 2024
I’ve been thinking about this tweet and on the question of what we owe to one another as people who share the same earth. I know that, for myself, I have often put too much importance on what would make me feel like I’m a better person when I’m trying to be a good friend instead of on what would actually be helpful for someone I love and care about.
And this leads to weird shit! Putting too much emphasis on the question of being a good friend/person instead of thinking about how my actions might have real impact leads to weird things—giving advice inappropriately, acting letdown when I don’t get praised, getting overly controlling, etc. I think that this desire to be a good person can really get in the way of taking our own actions seriously.
Wanting to be good, to be desired and loved and liked is seductive. But I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that believing myself to be a good person doesn’t actually solve that many problems. Funnily enough, the desire to be good can cause us to not see the good that we are already doing.
In February, all of our personal planets including the Sun, Mercury, Venus, and Mars will spend some time in Aquarius. The New Moon in Aquarius will also take place on February 9th. Saturn, Aquarius’s ruler, is sitting in a sign where it won’t be able to see all of those planets running through its own home. We could say that Saturn gives a cold shoulder to its own guests, that the events of February misrecognize themselves.
But there is a planet that all of the planets in Aquarius and Saturn in Pisces can see. What is that planet?
It’s Jupiter. Jupiter in Taurus. Jupiter in Taurus is Jupiter carved in stone.
When I think of Jupiter, I think of ideology and morality. I’ll share two stories with you on this topic.
When I was a teenager, my cousin went through a bad breakup. She decided that she needed to pray to someone so she took me to a mountain with a lot of immortal nuns. The nuns would sit and meditate to cultivate their energy and they stayed sitting there for centuries. I was being a negative nancy and kept trying to tell her that I didn’t want to go to a mountain with so many dead bodies. She held firm. She kept telling me that the nuns were still alive. We went to the mountain and prayed to the nuns for romantic guidance, debating over whether the bodies were real or fake the whole time.
Another story: last year around this time, I was chatting with my grandmother. She told me that when she went to see Mao’s body at Tiananmen where it used to be on display. Everyone who visited had to not only line up in a long line (a lot of people wanted to check to make sure that Mao was really dead I guess) and purchase really expensive fake flowers to place at his crypt. She complained that the whole thing was a scam. Not only were the flowers fake but she suspected that Mao’s body was also fake. She claimed that she even saw people stealing the flowers inside the crypt so that they could resell them on the street.
I think that Jupiter, which is concerned about morality, is also concerned about whether the world is real or fake. It is concerned about authenticity almost as much as morality. “Are you a good person?” Jupiter likes to ask. “A really really good person? You’re sure you’re not faking it? You’re not a hypocrite?” The more rigid our morality gets, the louder Jupiter’s questions also get. The bigger our ideas get, the more we are concerned about authenticity.
The questions that Jupiter asks us are good questions. Good questions can also obfuscate other questions—questions around effective action. Everyone who shares this world with us has some kind of internal contradiction or hypocrisy. No one in the world understands themselves fully. Sometimes, big personalities acquire power by leveraging our fear of visible hypocrisy and desire for complete goodness. I’m thinking about feel-good capitalism and about big, symbolic gestures. But guess what? Our struggles are not symbolic. They are material. They require all of us and our contradictions too.
And guess what? The most contradictory people are out here doing good work. Sometimes, the folks who are most concerned about moral purity are also the ones doing the least.
To me, the worst thing that could happen to an idea is the act of worship. That’s what I think. I’m ready to change my mind about that one. Just saying what I’m thinking here at least once in preparation for Jupiter’s loudness.
Aquarius
You’ve been thinking about the question of location for a while now. Location is one of the most important issues in life. Location impacts who you meet, who you think about when you think about right or wrong, and what you can access. All of these things have a huge impact on who you are and who you come to be.
When you think about location, think both long term and short term. You have no idea who you will be in ten or twenty years so why wouldn’t you think about today? And still, your decisions today can decide who you are allowed to be in ten or twenty years.
Location can be temporary. It can also have a sense of permanence. You shouldn’t move to a place that you don’t know how to leave but if you are thinking about how to get out of a place before you even set foot there then you probably shouldn’t move there at all. Look at other types of animals and how they choose their nests, holes, and voyages. Elephants wander while snakes huddle. Learn what type of animal you are based on how you make home happen. Yes, home is an event.
Questions for Aquarius for February 2024:
Why do you live where you live now?
What would happen if you continued to live here for ten more years?
Where else could you live?
Pisces
I think that one thing the internet has done to us is that it has cheapened the value of a really good conversation.
The thing is, our politics and the ways in which we describe our politics is not entertainment. Social media confuses us because we see some of the most important conversations that we could be having with each other next to pieces of consumable media. Our real relationships with each other are never sources of entertainment.
A really good conversation can be life changing. I’m talking about those long, sprawling conversations that you have with your best friend about everything and nothing. I’m talking about those moments and words that jolt you out of some waking dream. I’m talking about those startling conversations that many of us are willing to travel for days to have.
In February, I want you to have at least one really good conversation. Think about all of the ingredients that could make this possible. Stumble upon it maybe even just by chance. Don’t miss the opportunity for one especially when you have something important to talk about.
Questions for Pisces for February 2024:
When was the last time you had a really good conversation?
What did you talk about in that conversation?
Who do you like to chat with the most?
Aries
In February, I want you to value your food.
There’s many ways to value your food. One way is to eat all of it. Another way is to not eat all of it. A lot of different types of food can actually propagate itself if treated right. You can grow cabbage and lettuce in just a little water if you leave enough of it on the stem. You can grow bean sprouts in your kitchen and mushrooms in your bathroom.
One of the daoist immortals once came home and discovered that his house had been plundered. He showed absolutely no reaction and went outside to start planting millet. As he plowed and dug the field, he came across some buried treasure made of gold. Still completely unfazed, he left the gold alone and continued to plow. He knew that you can have all the gold in the world but you’ll still starve without food.
This is a religious story. When I was growing up, we had to sing a song thanking the peasants who made our meals possible before eating everyday in Kindergarten. Later on, my family started praying to Jesus before meals instead. Food is not a hoardable good. It rots. It’s not like gold which stays the same forever and doesn’t grow when we bury it. Food doesn’t bring us permanent security but we can’t live without it. When we grow it, we also grow life.
Questions for Aries for February 2024:
What kind of food do you know how to grow?
What kind of food grows well in your climate?
What kind of food do you how to find?
Taurus
I’m sitting here wondering about all of the miracles that you have already made happen simply because you are living life as the person you already are. I wonder whose lives you have touched in some way. I wonder who is cheering for your happiness and joy, who is able to recognize your success and celebrate it with you.
None of us were put here in this world to make it in some kind of career or to work some kind of job. However, no one in this world feels truly satisfied with life without making some kind of human sized impact. I’m not talking about hero sized change. I’m talking about noticing the value that your life intrinsically holds right here and right now as yourself.
I think that February will be about valuing the change that you are capable of and are already making happen. Your life isn’t worth more when you try to do more than what you’re capable of. Your actions are more meaningful when you do what you can and leave the rest for those who come to join you. You’re never as alone as your stress thinks you are. You always have people whose lives you have touched just by being yourself.
Questions for Taurus for February 2024:
What miracles have you already made possible?
Whose lives have you touched?
What are you happy about?
Gemini
In February, I want you to leave yourself enough room to waste time. Wasting time is inevitable. There is no way for anyone that is alive to lay out a plan and to accomplish it exactly, accounting for every single moment. To expect something like this for yourself would be inhumane. Human beings usually need to spend something like 20% of our waking time spacing out and staring at a wall.
Giving yourself time to waste keeps your brain sharp for when you use it the most. Wasting time gives you the chance to encounter unexpected thoughts instead of just the predictable ones. Wasting time puts you in touch with exploration.
Lay out some plans but always give yourself time to waste. If you have no time to waste, then that’s a sign that you’re not really in control of things. Always account for the meandering that lives at the heart of your soul. That smaller dreamer has its own ways of going about things but knows more than most of us credit it for.
Questions for Gemini for February 2024:
What was wasting time like when you were a kid?
What was wasting time like when you were a teen?
What is wasting time like as an adult?
Cancer
The language of gifts has its own cruelties. Anyone who thinks that gifting creates trust would be fooling themselves at least a little bit. Receiving more and more gifts from someone you don’t trust can actually create more distrust. Giving more and more can’t really accelerate trust when it hasn’t been earned. Trust moves at its own pace. It can be fast or slow but it can’t be forced.
I know that you are a giver. I understand that giving makes your heart feel free. I also understand that the thing you care most about is not whether or not someone accepts your gift but whether trust is secure.
This February, I want you to explore giving and friendship. There’s all sorts of small passions enwrapped in the ritual of gift giving. There’s obligation and responsibility but there’s also generosity and freedom. There’s gratitude and entitlement, there’s wishing and also refusing. All of these feelings are normal and okay. The reasons why you love to give so much may be much larger than any one feeling. You give because you value and love trust and people. That is your reason.
Questions for Cancer for February 2024:
What do you feel before you give?
What do you feel after you give?
Why do you give?
Leo
I think that I usually get into the most shit in life when I let my guilt make my decisions for me. Whenever I let my guilt choose my responsibilities, my commitments, and my friends for me I usually suffer the most and when my actions cause other people to suffer too. I think that this is because guilt can let us know what we are missing but it can’t tell us what we can build.
For February, I challenge you to give guilt your own answer. Give it your own answer from your heart, from your gut, and from your brain. Giving guilt a complete response requires a lot from you. You’ll need all of your intelligence, all of your kindness, and all of your courage.
You are capable of so much. You’re capable of more than just addressing your lacks. Your life is too meaningful to come from a place of lack. The past will always try to diminish you and cut you down to size. That’s history’s role in a way. But you have a future to take care of. You bring the past with you but you decide where to go.
Questions for Leo for February 2024:
What does your intelligence know you to be capable of?
What does your kindness know you to be capable of?
What does your courage know you to be capable of?
Virgo
The only thing worse than being despised for the wrong reasons is being praised for the wrong reasons. At least when you are insulted you have some motivation to fight back. You have a case to plead which usually results in uncovering some sense of truth. You do not get doubly insulted by being called ungrateful when you are very obviously insulted once.
In February, I want you to remember who you are. No matter what kind of feedback your friends and family may give you, you have your own reasons for caring about the things that you do. When you care about what you care about as yourself, then your feelings will be true. You are free to change your mind about your ideas when you have a strong enough sense of being who you are.
Never ever say things that you don’t really mean for the sake of changing another person’s opinion of you. What you are willing to say has a huge impact on who you become. You can also listen to other people, hearing them thoroughly, without repeating their words with your own. We’re not parrots here (unless you are). We don’t possess that level of skillful mockery.
Questions for Virgo for February 2024:
Whose opinions have you heard recently that you don’t share?
What kind of impact did those opinions have on you?
What do you know about what you really think?
Libra
What does it feel like when you are on the same page with someone? When both of you are putting in the effort to make something that was impossible yesterday possible tomorrow? How does that feeling differ from when you are expected to do something for someone else or when you might expect someone to do something that you don’t know how to do for you?
A lot of the time, we assume that the feeling of love brings us together. This isn’t always true. In fact, love may be more poignantly expressed by distance and by mutual yearning. Togetherness will take love but it will also accept other things—commitment, stamina, and even drudgery.
Right now, you’re learning how to experience life unalone. You’re learning how to share both your burdens and your gifts. Share, express, and ask. Talk about what you need in your own real words and see what happens. Use clarity, describe the situation well, and remember that there are people who are on the same page as you.
Questions for Libra for February 2024:
When was the last time you felt like you were on the same page with someone else?
What burdens were you willing to share in that moment?
What gifts were you willing to share in that moment?
Scorpio
I think that there are two ways to leave home. The first time you leave home, you pack your bags and you set off. This is what we usually think about when we think of leaving home. Leaving home in this way can feel like a new beginning, like hitting the fast forward on the remote of psychic change. We’re excited about leaving home, a little bit sad, but wondering if we are really ready all the same.
The second time we leave home happens when we come back. We come back and we see that home has changed in the time that we have gone away. Our parents have aged. The currency changed. There’s a new mayor in town and the river flows through a different place now. Even the food tastes different. We wonder if this has anything to do with our changed tongue.
I think that February brings to you some experience of leaving home. This could have to do with coming back to a place, with going to a new place, or even with running into someone you once knew. Something nostalgic is in store for you in February. Nostalgia is very important. Nostalgia is the feeling that you get when you understand something about the place from where you came.
Questions for Scorpio for February 2024:
At what time of the day do you usually feel the most nostalgic?
What does nostalgia taste like or smell like?
What does it make you remember about yourself?
Sagittarius
This February, I want you to make sure that you have enough time for all of the conversations that you want to have. You’re curious about everything and anything right now. Your brain just can’t stop turning. You have words and then you lose them and look for more words. You have meetings to coordinate and problems to solve. You have people to meet.
It’s actually okay to let some things fall off your plate because you don’t have enough time. You’re the one who is in control of your own life. You don’t need to do every single thing that someone else asks of you. You can say no and you can say no to yourself too when you really want to have time for something but just don’t. Sometimes, the more responsible thing to do when tending to all of your obligations is to just do less.
Being really busy is usually never a sign that you’re meeting all of your responsibilities. Being too busy for life means that something is being neglected, that you’re just doing too much. Root yourself back into the reasons for why you do the things you do and pick and choose.
Questions for Sagittarius for February 2024:
What do you not have time for?
What do you have time for?
What do your answers to the previous two questions tell you about your priorities at the moment?
Capricorn
Audre Lorde was actually the one who wrote that joy is a form of resistance. Why is joy a form of resistance? Becauseyour joy will make you harder to dominate. Joy makes you stronger, less hierarchical, and less precious with what you have. Joy connects you more deeply to other people and to life. You are harder to destroy when you are filled with joy.
In February, I want you to respect joy. Sometimes, we try to force joy into existence and, like a child with its own freewill, joy resists. We do things that we think will make us happy and get angry when they don’t. We will joy into our lives, trying to command it like a servant. But joy can’t be dominated. Joy does its own thing. Joy isn’t a servant but a friend. We find joy in surprising places. We don’t know what to do with it when it arrives.
Recognize joy when it arrives this February. You don’t have to do anything special and you don’t have to overly design your joy. You just have to know what joy looks like and feels like when it enters your life. And then you have to play with it and give it a bit of flair. That’s it.
Questions for Capricorn for February 2024:
What does joy feel like when you are in it?
What does an invitation for joy look like?
What does a chance encounter with joy look like?