Reparenting Gemini Moon

Dec. 22, 2020, 10:03 a.m.

You’re a Gemini Moon. You like being the one person to think against the grain in a room. You’re so used to thinking against the grain that the versions of you from Tuesday to Thursday could probably get in a long, winding argument against one another. You don’t mind being wrong. You don’t mind playing the bad guy. In fact, you often find that’s exactly the role you play. You find that people are more than happy to blame you for a group’s unhappiness.

You’re a Gemini Moon and you’ve never been cooperative. You’d rather sit alone in your room and watch TV for an eternity than talk to a bunch of boring people—that is, unless everyone else wants to watch TV. Then, you’re out on the town.

You’re a Gemini Moon and you’ve used to saying one thing while doing the opposite. You see no moral qualm in that. Contradiction is a fact of life. You’re a Gemini Moon and you’re more complex than the person you are in a single moment. You’re a Gemini Moon and everyone says that they know you but this confuses you, because you barely know yourself.

Gemini Moons are the first to speak out against power. Gemini Moon is an undisciplined thinker—a thinker that thinks across and beyond disciplines. Gemini Moons either did spectacularly or failed in school and Gemini Moons never learn one thing at one time.

Gemini Moons only talk about topics when they are unpopular. They’re the first to defend the marginalized. They only flip against a formerly held stance when they sense that the tides of power have shifted. You see—Gemini Moons are here to force us to deconstruct the stuff of ideology.

Not everyone trusts a Gemini Moon. This is frustrating for Gemini Moons because they are always ready to come to bat even for the least liked people if they feel that doing so is necessary for a group’s learning process. They are ready and willing to be the least liked person in the room as long as the room becomes an environment in which minds are ready to be changed. There might be times when it seems like Gemini Moon is the most popular person in the room and there might be times when they are the most hated.

Gemini Moons don’t care if you like them as long as they are right. Being right is a security mechanism. When they were young, they learned that nothing mattered as long as they were right—that no amount of neglect, or cruelty, or derision could get to them just as long as they remain right 100% of the time. Gemini Moons learn sarcasm and smartness as a shield.

You’re a Gemini Moon and you don’t have to be right all of the time. You’re a Gemini Moon and you’re exhausted by having to be right all of the time. You’re a Gemini Moon and not everyone wants to argue with you. You’re a Gemini Moon and you learn best when you are not right. You’re a Gemini Moon and the basis of your existence is never an argument because it should not be a thing that is ever doubted.

Reparenting Gemini Moon is about taking off the critic’s hat that makes you stand just a bit taller than everyone else while dragging your own head down for at least some moments of the day and finding a support language that you don’t feel like you have to immediately snark at. This is about support—not perfect agreement. You will never be happy in an environment of perfect agreement. You’re teaching yourself that you’re not under attack all of the time and that you don’t have to rehearse debates for things that threaten to make you cry in secret over and over again.

You’re a Gemini Moon and you’re not smarter than everyone else. You don’t have to be smarter than everyone else to feel safe. You no longer have to become smarter than everyone else through ruthless self examination. Your intelligence is not the thing that will teach you self compassion. Talking circles around the thing that you actually need because you think that you can outthink it does not teach you how to meet that need.

You’re a Gemini Moon. Stop examining yourself. You will never be able to anticipate the future by doing so. There is no need for you to anticipate the future when you are able to trust how you clarify and acknowledge your needs in the present.

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