Most of the people who I have met with Capricorn south node and Cancer north node are born in 1984. There’s been a few who were born in 2002 but most of my clientele are older millennials and younger gen x. There’s going to be generational differences between how each age group expresses their nodes and I will try to make a note of the differences that I observe but most of my notes are about people born in 1984.
I’ve noticed that folks born in 2002 with south node in Capricorn feel much more lost in terms of social belonging. I’ve noticed that folks born in 1984 with south node in Capricorn are a little more interested in meeting unmet emotional needs through dating than those born in 2002. However, that’s a very general statement. Obviously, gen z is interested in dating too. It’s just that they have less experience with it.
Both people born in 1984 and people born in 2002 with south node in Capricorn often feel controlled by their families. They often feel cut off from the world or isolated. Both want to feel accepted and to belong. I think of this nodal axis like the ugly little duckling nodal axis. They’re nodes that are trying to find a warm embrace.
I’ve found that gen z with south node in Capricorn is a little more interested in looking for nostalgic subcultures that represent boundless friendships. I’ve noticed that millennials with south node in Capricorn is a little more interested in the pure romance of complete acceptance and devotion. However, a lot of the emotional themes are the same.
Assumptions about Cancer north node/Capricorn south node
There’s a lot of assumptions that Capricorn south node only knows how to work, that they’re always going to be Successful people with a capital S who are just looking for someone who finally cuts into their hardened exterior and provokes a little vulnerability out of them. There’s an assumption that Capricorn south node people are really good at succeeding in capitalism.
This isn’t true. There’s absolutely nothing about having a Capricorn south node that will make you more successful in capitalism. What makes you successful in capitalism is inherited wealth. Most people with Capricorn south nodes don’t inherit wealth.
Apart from this, there’s also an assumption that Capricorn south node Cancer north node people are emotionally stunted. Again, this often is not the case. How much someone has grown emotionally really just depends on their circumstances, on the level of support they have, and on a wide variety of factors. There’s a lot of Capricorn south node Cancer north node people who are incredibly emotionally wise, mature, and sensitive.
The trouble with assuming that Capricorn south node Cancer north node people are emotionally unintelligent is that this makes it so that a lot of the advice given to this nodal axis is to look for care externally. If you assume that someone can’t grow on their own, then you can only recommend that they look for caregivers who can give teach them emotionally. Unfortunately, this actually feed into a lot of the insecurities that come with a Capricorn south node Cancer north node, which has to do with a sense of not belonging and a yearning for that One Person who finally understands them.
Security Issues: Capricorn south node
Capricorn south node people were taught that it is dangerous to reveal oneself emotionally. They were taught that you have to have earned emotional expression, that it is unsafe to do so until one is in a position of complete strength, and that no one will listen to your emotions until you have also earned their respect.
A lot of the time, Capricorn south node people perform emotional release without embodying emotional vulnerability. These people are not always closed books, unless they are. They typically have one or two points about their story that they are willing to share to any group of people, even strangers. This is because Capricorn south node people often feel as though they have to be emotionally prepared for any scenario.
Preparation is a lot of work! Capricorn south node people are often very busy. They often learn all of the language and skill needed for emotional facilitation or love languages or attachment theory. They know everything there is to know about what it means to have feelings. However, when Capricorn south node learns and prepares from a position of control, they actually feed into their fear of losing control.
What really defines Capricorn south node is guilt. These people feel an immensity of guilt over who they are, who they are not, and about their bonds with family. Often, Capricorn south node people feel that they owe someone something even in cases when they do not. When they do not examine the guilt that they wear, a lot of their actions are guided by fear.
Guilt is a feeling of indebtedness. Relationships will always have a sense of indebtedness because, in order to belong with someone, we also belong to them. You can owe someone something while being owed by the same person. The reason why guilt is such a crucial emotion for Capricorn south node is that guilt is often an emotion that was used to manipulate them.
It is important for Capricorn south node to accept debt without guilt. Guilt makes them blame themselves when they are less than perfect, try to appease people inauthentically, and to put themselves in situations that are not right for them. Guilt makes them afraid. Debt, to the world and to family, may be inevitable but it doesn’t have to be a thing that produces punishment. Debt can be wonderful to owe.
Fears: Cancer north node
Cancer north nodes are big babies! I’m sorry but I had to say this. Again, there’s this idea that this nodal axis is so hardened and unfeeling and I’ve just not found this to be the case. Instead, I’ve found that these people are the most sensitive, creative, and playful babies in the world. They throw the best temper tantrums and they cry so honestly.
The thing is—Cancer north node wants, sometimes desperately, to be babied. They want to be taken care of. This is a wonderful part of these people because it means that they do not judge others by what they achieve but by how available they are emotionally. When a Cancer north node speaks up and asks for care courageously, they tend to find that people go out of their way to hold them.
However, it’s the asking that is truly hard. Cancer north node people are terrified of appearing weak. This isn’t because they subscribe to any ideas that strength is the best thing or anything but, again, because they carry so much guilt. Cancer north node people are afraid that they are a disappointment, that they will disappoint the people who make them feel so guilty. They can feel as though their unspoken debts are their alone to bear and that asking for help from other people will make them powerless.
Emotional vulnerability is hard for Cancer north node. Cancer north node thinks that emotional vulnerability is scary because they’re afraid of losing control but that’s not quite it. The real reason why Cancer north node is afraid of emotional vulnerability is because they’re attached to their guilt.
Cancer north node has a secret fantasy that, someday, they will make right with the world and return all the debts that everyone around them thought they could not carry. They dream that they will be able to do this alone so that they can prove anyone who ever said a bad thing about them wrong. It can be hard for them to realize that negative messages they received when they were young don’t need to be proven wrong—rather, the hurts that they endured have often been internalized as a guilt so immense and normalized that it starts to feel a bit like identity.
Healing and Growth
Healing and growth happens for Capricorn south node when they start to ask for what they need out loud without anticipating the reactions of other people. This is incredibly hard to do. It cuts into years of paranoia and guardedness.
The not caring about what other people think thing is crucial because Capricorn south node is very prepared for any sign of rejection. Often, Cancer north node goes out of its way to make it so that another person can’t reject them. However, this feeds into the insecurity that there is no place in the world for someone as alienated as Capricorn south node even more. Cancer north node needs to learn that you can’t manipulate someone into loving you through guilt, that whether someone does or does not is completely up to them.
It is crucial for Cancer north nodes to own their vulnerability as something they are in charge of and control because, often, Cancer north node externalizes the yearning for acceptance into another person or a group. Cancer north node idealizes people who seem accessible emotionally and expects that person or group to save them from loneliness. It doesn’t happen this way. Loneliness is not about who is around you. It’s about whether you believe that you are loved.
Sometimes, Cancer north node can idealize providers. This can look like someone older who appears to have their shit together who can baby Cancer north node. This can also look like someone younger who seems more open who can help Cancer north node relax. Sometimes, it’s not a person who is idealized but a group or even industry. The thing that Cancer north node needs to learn in all relationships is that there is no one who will swoop in and save them by making them fall in love.
Cancer north node needs to realize that they are loveable, that they do not need guilt to define their relationships, and that their self worth is not produced through the leveraging of guilt for them or against them. They need to learn that their debt to the earth and ancestors is something that is worth celebrating because their existence and life is worthy of celebration. They need to learn how to ask for love despite the feeling of guilt that might come and go because debt, in good relationship, is not held against them or used as evidence of their supposed sins.